Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) By eating grilled cheese sandwiches or Oreo cookies just before I go to bed, I've been inducing some strange, frantic dreams. It's more carelessness than any kind of intentional experimentation. But it reminds me of how you've been behaving lately. Instead of letting my body go about the important business of resting itself, I'm diverting energies to the process of digestion. Likewise, you've been redirecting some of your personal power to accomplish goals that are far less interesting, desirable or vital than what you'd want to do naturally. I'll make you a deal: I'll stop torturing my subconscious with complex carbohydrates if you'll quit kicking your own ass when you could be getting somewhere.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Could they make social change any simpler? Websites like www.therainforestsite.com, www.thehungersite.com and www.saverainforest.net make it as easy as typing in a Web address and clicking a button. Advertisers pay for the food that's donated or the land that's bought. All you have to give is a moment of time and attention. But my point isn't about preserving rainforest land or feeding starving people. People are going out of their way to make something that would be good for you?easy for you, as well. Yet still you resist! What's up with that? Just click the damn button already.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Superman hates walking. Wouldn't you, if you could fly? Actually, being as well endowed with superpowers as you are has its disadvantages. Avoid dependence on those fantastic?but unreliable?special abilities of yours. Exposure to your own personal Kryptonite is bound to happen eventually?maybe even this week?and I'd rather you be less helpless than a baby koala bear. Practice your practical skills this week?you know, the ordinary feats the rest of us mere mortals perform any day of the week.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) I admit it: I had a thing for Chewbacca. Let's not get too kinky here?I mean it appealed to me to have a powerful, intelligent, sharp-toothed, gun-wielding, yet somehow cuddly friend around. Having a giant dog like my hound Eli is the closest substitute I could come up with on short notice, but I've recently discovered something special about you, Pisces. We already know you're your own worst enemy, and good at creating scary creatures to freak yourself out with. But now we know that being your very own monster can be a good thing, too.
Aries (March 21-April 19) You think too much. Quit it! Swat those tiny, pesky thoughts away like the inconsequential gnats they are. Your smartest thoughts come from your body, not your brain. Trust your gut. It knows how to sort through your life and get rid of the shit. I'm not ready to argue that it's always better to not think things through, but this week?listen to your instincts. If you find yourself repeatedly hashing something out in your mind, listen to what your deepest impulse is, even if it doesn't make sense. Some of the best choices never do.
Taurus (April 20-May 20) I finally cleaned my room. I got tired of tiptoeing around my things, trying not to break stuff while navigating through my bedroom. At first, it was a relief to just let things sprawl and take up as much space as entropy dictated, especially after months of living out of my car or in small spaces. But, eventually, I needed to enjoy the amount of space my new house afforded me, and that meant that my possessions needed to occupy less of it. In a similar way, you've been letting some unruly emotions stretch out and enjoy your mental facilities. Vacation's over, though. It's time for those feelings to pack up and?even if they don't leave the resort?at least move out of the honeymoon suite.
Gemini (May 21-June 20) Ouch, your poor ass. You're not a big cat, like those lucky Leos. That means you don't always get to land on your feet. More often than not, it's your butt that takes the fall. Unfortunately, this week there are some folks who'd love to take a potshot at you, or even swing a fist, if the situation permits. Those Taureans might be able to take a blow like that and keep charging, but that's not your forte. Want my advice? Don't count on a feline ability to tell which way is up, or bull-like strength and endurance. See a pounding coming? Dodge.
Cancer (June 21-July 22) As I reflected on your possible fate this week, my mind went blank. That's when I realized?you've dropped completely off the radar. This can be both good and bad. In order to get you started on the right foot, I've begun a "to-do" and (more importantly) a "not-to-do" list. To do: Attempt that secret undercover mission that you've been saving "for the right time." Share the bad news that's been weighing on your mind. Not to do: Try to get noticed by your longstanding crush. Be a squeaky wheel?you're not likely to get any grease this week. Count on not receiving any special attention?no rewards, but no punishments, either.
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) It's not often that the king steps off his throne to sully his royal feet with some actual ass-kickin' action. This is one of those weeks, however, when pointing a jewel-encrusted scepter and watching minions do your nefarious bidding can't be as satisfying as getting your fancy, expensive clothing all sweaty and filthy doing it yourself. Despite its persistent appeal and convenience, ordering people around and getting your ass kissed does get boring occasionally. Don't let your lackeys have all the fun this week?do your dirty work yourself.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) I've been sporting dredlocks for a couple of years. Now that I'm pondering cutting them off, I have to think about what parts of my psyche I'll shed with them. It's not often that we get such a concrete chance to pick and choose what will stay and what will go. Along with a bunch of dead (yet somehow meaningful) hair, I have the opportunity to intentionally end one chapter (and begin another, obviously). You may not be ready for a new 'do this week, but you are primed to cut away some dead ends and give yourself some space to grow some new beginnings.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Vote for Ralph Nader. No, I won't threaten you with dire fates or astrological doom if you don't. Of course, you should vote your conscience. But as your own personal scales grow in complexity and accuracy, you're bound to notice that a balance with only two sides (that pretty much weigh the same) can never be enough. I live in California, which, like New York, is a solid Gore state, so my choice to vote Green Party is even more clear. Five percent of the vote would win him federal funds, making him a contender in the next election. Interested in fairness in your life? (Don't lie; I know you are.) Propagate it out in the rest of your world. It's bound to come back to you eventually.
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