This Week's Horoscope

| 16 Feb 2015 | 04:50

    Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) Just because you hang out with some fast-talking, brilliant and outrageous friends, you're privy to many experiences that you might've missed out on otherwise. As a result, you've led a pretty lucky life in many ways. But sometimes you can't help feeling that only a little of your good fortune was bought by your own merit. Whether or not that's true, you shouldn't feel bad about it. It's you those amazing friends like, after all. Besides, this week you'll get to do more than ride the coattails of your companions. They'll be hanging on to your shirtsleeves or eating your dust. Now that it's your lead, all that's left to decide is: where will you take them (and yourself)? Aries (March 21-April 19) Once I get glitter in my dredlocks, it's there for a long time, if not forever. No matter, though. Glitter is "the color" of '00. All that sparkles may not be gold, but it sure is pretty. There's a lot about your own image that you can do little or nothing about, but don't let that make you unhappy. Yours is the power?especially this week?to make or break the trends. So if you're stuck with something you can't change?don't hate it. Make it cool. Taurus (April 20-May 20) My friends and I stayed on a pristine island in Thailand for a few days, where thousands of hermit crabs make their home. It was great fun for some of us to toss the timid creatures into a complex, human-constructed sand maze. I doubt the shy beasts felt too tortured; they gamely made their way around our convoluted paths and tunnels. Still, I made sure they always had a way out?just as you should, when planning your own intricate adventures for the months ahead. Gemini (May 21-June 20) You've heard of "deja vu." It means, roughly, "already seen." Other similarly named mental phenomena include "jamais vu" ("never seen") and "presque vu" ("almost seen"). The former refers to the problem of temporarily being unable to recognize familiar objects or people. The latter describes the sensation of being on the brink of a great revelation, of truly seeing "the big picture," but not quite getting it. I hope you experience an even lesser-known vision this week, which I'll call "vouloir voir" ("to want to see"). We all want you to see things exactly as they are, instead of viewed (and distorted) through the filters of your past. In this case, desire equals ability?you can see, if you want it enough. Open your eyes, Gemini. The truth is waiting. Cancer (June 21-July 22) Although you don't always have much control over it, your extreme changeability (some call it moodiness) makes you an excellent chameleon. In the right mood, you can be as quick-witted as a Gemini, as seductive as a Scorpio or as temperamental as an Aries. Sometimes this is a handicap of sorts, such as when your frame of mind doesn't fit your situation. But if forewarned about the layout of your future emotional terrain, you could insert yourself into or create situations you'd excel in. As with atmospheric turbulence, your own fluctuations are extremely hard to predict (you might crash and burn despite our best efforts), but it's fairly safe to say that this week you'll have more charm and radiance than a movie starlet, and less ego to fuck it up with. So put yourself out there, Crabby. Your imminent fame awaits. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) Traveling in Thailand has given my friends and me ample reason and opportunity to talk about our shit?its consistency, odor and frequency all being important information to share in this context. Naturally, we're not at all squeamish when discussing our bodily functions, but to preserve the delicate sensibilities of other travelers eating breakfast or dinner nearby, we call pooping "making a choice." For example: "I was feeling a bit choosy this morning. I made three choices before breakfast. Seems like this is turning out to be a multiple-choice kind of day!" There must be a way to say those things you're dying to talk about, but don't know how. Try inventing your own language or code, try drawing a picture?in fact, try anything that'll let you let it out. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) For the first time in my life, I find myself contending with a little belly. Oh, it's not much, yet. But finding evidence of my body's slowing metabolism is daunting. Your own encounter with previously undiscovered or nonexistent limits shouldn't scare you. Instead, let it inspire you. Once you know your boundaries, you can concentrate on expanding them; no constraint is completely unbreakable. So you needn't settle for being merely more capable than those around you?you can concentrate on becoming more efficient and powerful than you've ever been before. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Your intentions are good. No one's questioning that. But the bottom line is that you simply do not have the power to personally restore balance or bring harmony to every situation, nor even most of them. The upside to this is you get to realize that sometimes beauty or wisdom can come from conflict, asymmetry or trouble. Immediately smoothing over the problem is not always the best solution. The next time you encounter choppy waters, don't flatten them. Try to ride them instead. Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) There are many subtly different descriptions of the tri-fold nature of the Scorpio temperament. The basic theme includes the scorpion, the eagle and the phoenix. Each represents a different point in your personal evolution. Ideally, you should be able to shift between these powerful modes. As a scorpion, you have the power to sneak around and sting your enemies. As an eagle you can see for long distances and achieve personal serenity. And as the phoenix you can awe and stun everyone as you blaze back from defeat, brighter than before. Your task this week is to begin to learn which is appropriate when, then make use of it. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) In some places you can get paid to give blood plasma. You can sell internal organs on the black market, or grow your hair long and market it to an upscale wigmaker. You could also work that street corner, if you got desperate enough. Not exactly what you had in mind when you thought about selling yourself? Self-promotion is a lot of work, and it's hard to tell when to work it and when to sit back and let it work itself. Just make sure if you start parceling out chunks of your beauty, physical or otherwise, that you leave yourself something to work with after they're gone. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) As I've wandered around Asia, I've had numerous opportunities to hear and entertain broad, ridiculous generalities about my fellow travelers (the Japanese are the most stylish, the Swedes are the friendliest and the Americans are the most obnoxious). These stereotypes are good for a laugh or two, but hardly useful in the long run as practical models?there are almost as many exceptions as supporting examples. Far more useful is to truly meet and evaluate each individual based on the moment, rather than some preconceived idea. This is infinitely more complex than sticking to hard-and-fast rules, but so much richer, too. The pure and uncompromised dictums of your own life have got to change, and the sooner the better. Until you revise your personal judgments, you're stuck.